How to be your own best friend.....

        I came across this good article by Leanne French "Be your own BESTFRIEND" in the NEXT magazine; August 2009(a local magazine-published in NZ). I think it's good to share this with everybody. When I read the article, it made me reflect on my own self-view. I sometimes have few negative opinions on the way I look, the way I behave, the way I do things etc. It's hard to be positive when you have some negative thoughts lingering in your head. Somehow after I finished reading the article, I realized that before you love other people, it's better to love yourself.(mesti ramai yg dah tahu pasal ni kan tapi susah nak praktikkan). WHY??? Well, when we treat yourself nicely, accept and value yourself, you'll be merrier happier! When you are happy and you know it, you'll clap your hands , you'll become good a better friend, parent, partner etc. Thus, how to do you learn or nurture the self-love? Here are some tips....

 Tips for nurturing self-love:

• Make good choices for your mind and body
• Make sure your essential needs are met.
• Be positive and encouraging.
• Reward yourself.
• Believe in your talents and abilities.
• Nurture your potentials.
• Trust your instincts.
• Make time to do the things you love.
• Be proactive and responsible.
• Value your time.
• Own your feelings.
• Set boundaries and enforce the consequences.
• Radiate self-respect.

How do you know that you've been a good friend to others in your life??? Well, it's hard to tell or even when you ask those who are close to you, they might tell that you are a good friend just because they don't want to hurt you. I'm glad that there are some indicators given in the article about being a good friend.

A good friend is....

• Interested and interesting.
• Someone who puts boundaries in place.
• Respectful. A good friend respects themselves, shows respect towards others and only accepts being treated with respect.
• Able to show vulnerability now and again. (this is sometimes hard! I know!)
• Happy to share their thoughts and experiences with you and asks about yours.
• Someone who doesn't preach, teach or tell. Instead, asks and listens. (hmmm you might have some who like to preach a.k.a membebel atau bagi nasihat mcmlah diaorg pandai sgt kan)
• Affectionate and tolerant.
• Someone who keeps blame and critism turned down, and acceptance and admiration turned up.
• Able to let a lot of things go. (especially about the disagreements or bad things that happened in the past)
• Someone  who affirms and validates.  (kind of reassurances to what your friend says or thinks)
• Makes you laugh until your sides ache. (not sure if I've made my friends laughed before)

You might have your own opinions about this. I would like to hear if you agree or disagree about what I've shared here. This is just what I've got from the article and I somehow agree to certain extends about what the author (Leanne French) of this article has said.