Salam,
In our life, we know that there's always be the causes and the effects. We are forced to consider the causes and of course the effects when we want to make any decisions. I love to teach my children about the causes and effects of their actions. I reckon, when they understand that whatever they can cause some effects, they'll have to think first before they act.
HOWEVER.................after sometimes, I'm now constantly have to battle with their questions of "WHY MAMA?" for everything that I ask them to do.
SO, let's look at some examples of the conversations that I had with my daughters so far:
Conversation 1
Me: Come on Fathini, hurry up! Or else we're going to be late.
Tini: But why Mama? Why?
Me: It's already 8.30 now and your school starts at 8.45.
Tini: Why school starts ermmm 8(she couldn't say the time correctly yet)...... mama?
Me: Well, it's because your teacher said so.
Conversation 2
Me:Hafizah, tidy up your toys.
Hafizah: I'm tired. Why Mama, ....tidy up?
Me: You played and now its your duty to tidy up.
Hafizah: I don't want to tidy up.......(she made a-pity-me-face) because I'm sleepy and tired.
Me: If you don't tidy up, next time you can't play with your toys. Kakak (Fathini) likes to tidy up, so she can play with the toys next time.
Hafizah: I want to play (2x). (then she'll cry)
Based on my experiences dealing with my daughters, I reckon at the age of 4-6, they are able to understand more on the reasoning. That's why Fathini is able to accept causes and effects of her actions. Unfortunately, for Hafizah who's just 3, she's still struggling to accept the concept. Most of the time she rebels. Maybe it's also because she's the second child who has the second child syndrome?
What about your battle with your kids? Do you have the same problem? How do you deal with them? What's your approach?
14 comments:
how true about the 2nd child syndrome..hanafialways cleans up after Hambali's mess...hambali is not so discipline compared to Hanafi..
K.Nur, ur DD are very clever on getting to understand cause & effect.. :-)
I can't wait to do reasoning dgn anak, najihah dah 2 tahun tp sy lebih reasoning kpd diri sy sdr spy kesabaran bertambah, dia tgh dlm phase tantrums je. Tp bila anak da pandai bckp ni kita kena lebih kreatif juga kan utk mjawab psoalan2 diorang, i might as well beli ensiklopedia je utk najihah..hehe
hok kecik tuh lamo2 bulih pehe la..
ibu keno kreatif la nak wi reason sst perkara..
oooo sebab tu lah ti manjo dan kuat majuk, sbb ti adao 3rd child syndrome..buke ti sajo2 nok manjo hahahaha
*psssstt: ado ko 3rd child syndrome?*
psl suruh tidy up tu, berbuih2 mulut dah.
kdg2 adam dgr ckp, kdg2 tu, mcm2 trick dia buat. huhhhh
sometimes I have to be more creative with them Hanz.
just and wait and see Mila. An encyplopedia is a good tool though.
Nak kreatif tu la yg susoh sikit kdg2, Hamizah.
ado kot 3rd child syndrome Tie. hehe
Ur lit Adam is testing ur patience Belle. Hang on there.
aiseh. rasa sindrom 2nd child tu betoi. pasai i ni pun perangai lain macam, susah my parents nak handle. hahaha
http://twinkywinkystars.blogspot.com
kakyon tak brp nampak sgt 2nd child sindrom dlm keluarga sbb kakyong ade 9 org adik... ;)
it's happend to be the 4t,... ;)
anak2 pulak, so far fikri dah boleh di ajak berbual & reasoning... selalunya kalo dia tgh okay.. mood baik/hepi.. then mudah..
Anis & aliya... hmmm, ini 2 orang memang belum melepasi tahap utk memahami kenapa tak boleh..
but then, they listen to their brother.. kalo abg kata, jom susun mainan.. then sama2 susun/simpan mainan... so most of the time ibunya hanya perlu cakap 'abang, cepat ajak adik masuk/ajak adik mandi/ajak simpan mainan...'
tq kak...bleh apply kat e-ein ni...e-ein lak rapat betul dgn auntie dia, sampaikan kalau merajuk dgn kita, dia gi polok2 auntie dia (darjah satu)
This is just one approach that might work on some children but not to some.
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